It’s amazing.

Everywhere you look people are relishing in pumpkin EVERYTHING. Pumpkin spice lattes, notorious pumpkin patch pictures with their SO. No matter where you look, it’s evident that it is officially fall. But in addition to seeing ankle booties, plaid and blanket scarves, I have seen more handholding, kisses and i-love-you’s being exchanged than in a Nicholas Sparks movie.

What?!

Being a religious believer of the saying, relationships are a winter sport, I can’t help but wonder whether these couples are holding on to the last few summer days or if in fact they found love on the Jersey Shore.

Being someone who has never uttered those three words before, well at least to a human. I have certainly uttered them to my Tory Burch Robinson Tote – how could you not? Have you seen how versatile it is? I have even expressed my undying love to my So Kate Louboutin Pumps – purple and coveted.

So, I took to what any ignorant person would do … I researched on google.

You cant imagine the number of articles out there written about love: when to say it, no literally – like how long to wait before you say it. How to say it. If you should say it. Why you should say it. Why you shouldn’t say it.

Now, call me inexperienced, but since when are two relationships them same? Where does men’s health get off on telling guys that they should wait until the 3-month mark to tell their girlfriends that they love them? Or Gossip Girl telling women that they should never be the first one to say I love you, because it causes a power shift.

Okay – maybe I agree with the power shift… not to suggest that I think women are inferior to men, because that couldn’t be farther from my standpoint. In fact, I believe that most generally the genuine success of a man – not necessarily highlighted in a paycheck – but his happiness, his home, his family, and sometimes his job, is achieved because he has a strong woman to fall back on. But I can’t say that I disagree with GG’s statement – maybe because I find that love has a lot to do with this romantic notion that us women have illustrated in our heads. The candles, the flowers, that perfect moment when your SO looks at you and simply tells you that they knew from the moment they met you that you were the one; before they utter those three little words you’ve been waiting for.

TIME OUT – are we actually paying attention to the frilly fairytale we’ve conjured in our heads?

I-knew-from-the-moment-I-met-you?! I love the sentiments, I think it’s beautifully crafted, I just can’t say that I agree. I’ll go back to my previous post where I was taught that great love is patient, but I will also add that I was raised to believe that people don’t fall in love, they grow into it.

Trust me, I know. It sounds cynical and so far removed from romance… I couldn’t agree more! Especially since I have said I love you to plenty pairs of shoes at first sight on the display tables at Nordstrom.

However, people are different… hear me out.

That immediate can’t live-can’t breath-check my phone every minute-don’t want to be without them rush of emotions… fades. Then you’re left with the reality that they leave dirty dishes in the sink, they don’t use coasters, they’ve gained a few pounds since you first started dating or you really dislike the way they handle stress.

Do you still feel like you can’t live without them?

That you cannot imagine being without them?

Or have these little things come to crawl under your skin, because that lust has faded? You’re finally starting to see the person you’re with in their purest sense, and perhaps you’re not at all as interested as you thought.

That’s the thing – I can’t quite say you were ever in love, because love isn’t just about a fleeting feeling and you don’t happen to “fall in love.” See, that passion that you feel at the beginning it’s the driving factor in wanting to spend time with this other person; it helps to foster open communication channels and an attachment or a connection if you will. That creates trust, a safe place to turn too – and that takes time. Some people come with baggage and their walls are harder to break than others, while some just don’t want to invest the time to build a foundation. But it’s in that time where you start to see who a person really is, and find that there is something perfect in imperfections and honesty.

My favorite moment of honesty are in the early mornings – I mean, have you ever paid attention to your SO when they wake up in the morning? I mean really paid attention to the way they look, feel, smell – that’s beauty in its most honest shape. I for one, cannot get enough of those mornings together.

I digress.

And that connection that was built from talking, spending time together, really opening up – it implies that the two of you will work through misunderstandings and issues that should arise. It means always giving the benefit of the doubt, and working together to better your relationship, because you’re committed to each other – and pursing your relationship no matter how you might feel that day.

This brings us back full circle – do you still “love” with your SO even though they leave dishes in the sink? What if they lost their job? Or got sick? I’m not saying you have to agree with everything but I am saying that sometimes you have compromise – and that all the time you have to respect differences. Love isn’t just an emotion, its an action. And you’ll realize that in strengthening those emotion and showing your love, you’ll grow into this amazing relationship  

Compromise… that was the point of this entire rant. Compromise has a lot to do with love, because it means you’re willing to put the happiness of someone else before your own.

Well my compromise of the week, being as I have the biggest sweet tooth in the world and my other half allows only one baked good in the house at the time –I compromised and made Peanut Butter cookies for my SO, even though I despise them. It’s the little things. Check out the pictures on my Instagram @brighteyesandhighheels and see the recipe below! Happy Baking & Enjoy Growing into Love.

& as always – thanks for listening to my rant. xx

Peanut Butter Cookies

1 ½ cups peanut butter

½ cup oil

1 ¼ cup brown sugar (make sure its tightly packed)

3 tbsp. half and half

2 tbsp. vanilla extract

1 egg

1 ¾ cup flour

¾ tsp. baking soda

I usually preheat the over to 375 and get my cookie trays ready. I then sift the baking soda and flour in a bowl. Then I beat the peanut butter, oil, sugar, milk and vanilla with an electric beater at its lowest setting. I add in the egg, and then slowly add the flour mixture and beat until mixed together. I roll then into balls and flatten them out with a criss-cross design made with a fork and I bake for 8 minutes. I then move on a wire rack to cool. I leave them cooling for about 45-minutes, because they are very soft upon coming out of the oven.